I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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