thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Randomize
