that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
