Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
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