I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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