he shaved USA in his pubs
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
why do cheetos always look like penises
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
