no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
