dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
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