I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
