There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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