Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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