he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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