He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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