Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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