Cold hands, warm shart.
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
one two three fourrrrnication!
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
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