the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Randomize
