where am i from again
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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