he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize
