i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Randomize
