DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
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