We won't sleep together?
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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