How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
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