normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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