im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
