so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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