Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Randomize
