My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
