Your face is a jimmy john
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Randomize
