That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
