is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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