I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Randomize