okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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