At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
