You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize
