..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
