And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
