i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
It was confusing and full of hummus
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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