ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
