shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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