Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
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