The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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