Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Sex in the backyard? Check.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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