I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
