Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize
