i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
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