i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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