only if we run a train.
done.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
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