if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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