We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
