i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Randomize
