Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
pray to the hookup gods
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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