i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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